Two weeks ago I drove from KL to Batu Pahat to attend a wedding. I made several stops at R&Rs to buy myself some of those magical and fascinating highway transit food: Maggie's Mashed Potato. How can 150 grams of brown liquid transformed into a cup of delicious mashed potato in a matter of seconds? Spare me the science, I still think it's freakin' magical.
While I was dipping my plastic spoon into the cup of processed potato goodness, I overheard a loud conversation next to me. There were 4 pakciks conversing animatedly like a bunch of old friends. Being the penyibuk that I am, I sat nearer to the table to capture the gist of the conversation.
"Kita bukan apa Samad! Cumanya, orang cina ni dah memang melampau. Kau tahu tak, 80% ekonomi kita dihambat dek cina. Ni ha sekarang ni, si Najib nak tukar DEB, tak ke semakin tertindas orang melayu?"
"Aku tahuuuu. Aku tahu kau suka sangat dengan PKR kau tu tapi kau pun sama, DAP tu pun tujuannya nak menghancurkan orang melayu. Nasib DAP dapat Pulau Pinang je. Kalau Perak masih bawah DAP, kena buang negara Sultan aku rasa macam PAP buat dekat Singapura dulu. Entah mana dah Sultan Singapura tu merempat."
"Kau kena ingat, kita kena bangun lawan kuasa cina sebelum jadi parah orang melayu kita. Kau tengok jelah kita, dah pencen tapi duit pencen seciput aje. Orang cina hah, naik BM, naik Merc. Kita kena bangun! Kita kena lawan!"
"Kau nak kita buat apa ni Mael?" Samad chuckled after seeing Mael's animated expression. "Semangat je nak perjuangkan hak melayu."
"Ha, ni produk kesihatan baru. 100% melayu! Kita buat, kita jual, kita...."
Ceh. Pujuk orang join MLM rupanya. Hampeh punya Pak Mael.
It's funny how malays feel soooo threatened by the chinese. I mean, the chinese contributes a huge bulk in our income tax that fuels this country. In a way, the chinese are supporting their underperforming malay friends. So why should Pak Mael use issues like chinese economy superiority to influence Pak Samad to join a MLM?
He could've just said that the MLM will make him a millionaire in a year to entice Pak Samad. You know how malays react when words like Jutawan, Mudah and Cepat is combined to form a proposition... Mata bersinar-sinar, punggung gatal dan perasaan excited nak bagitahu bini.
The way I see it, malays whine far too much. If they want to gain control of the economy so bad, they should make it a point and start by learning a thing or two about basic finance. We can't expect bigots like Ibrahim Ali to demand control just because we're malays, the rightful 'owners' of this land. You think the chinese will be like "Owh ya, you ARE the rightful owners of this land. Therefore I will surrender my factories, shops and lands to you, the rightful owners of this land. Goodbye and farewell, rightful owners of this land!"
I think we have better luck with 'halal' 4D sms services advertised in Metro newspaper than to expect chinese folks to move back to China and leave all their accumulated wealth here. You know we could just work harder and be smarter to get rich. That, or we could always join Luxor.