The Durian Analogy

My cousin just broke up with his long time girlfriend. Everyone has to learn from their mistakes eventually. The only people who will benefit from break ups are smart but unattractive girls. Knowing that they won't win men's hearts with their looks, they work on their personality and skills. When men are in their late twenties and had already learnt valuable lessons from their gruesome break ups with attractive girls , the smart ugly girls will snatch them away and bring them home to meet their parents.

Damn you smart ugly girls!

Anyway, I was devastated to have heard the news so posted a few lines of sound advice to him. I called it the Durian Analogy:

Love is like a durian. It drops unexpectedly but there is no other joy than finally hearing its thump on the ground. Once you find the durian, you'll realize that the durian is not as perfect like the durian you've been fantasizing for hours while waiting for it to drop. No, it doesn't look like a rainbow coloured blowfish.

And then we have to bring home the durian. There is not much trouble transporting the durian because we can just put it in the car but the car will reek of durian for a whole week. Once home, the whole family will gather around the durian. Some might put on a smug face and hide in their rooms because of the smell but almost everyone will welcome the durian with open gloved hands (and mouths)

A time will come when you will open up the durian to eat the delicious content. It's difficult to open it, I know. The thorns and the rock hard skin can be daunting. Just when you're about to open it, your brother calls to tell you that you are a step closer to win a stamp licking competition and that you have to attend the finals as soon as possible. Since stamplicking is your life passion and winning a competition means the whole world to you, you leave the durian and rush to the post office.

In the mean time, your family watches out for the durian. But the durian is already half opened so it will attract preys. But since it is so well protected, it is left on the kitchen floor alone until the strong smell wears off. You are in a middle of licking stamp when your mom calls you to tell you that the durian had just gone bad. And then you remembered how you promised to eat the durian. You just remembered the distinct scent of the durian. But it is too late.

The durian is too old to be eaten properly so Kak Seri made tempoyak out of it so opah could keep it in her room inside her sarong closet so a CHP (certified house parasites) like Afiq will not get his hands (and mouth) on it.

It's okay. Like durian, love is abundant. It's everywhere. Just wait for the right season when you're responsible enought to lick stamps and eat durian at the same time. Okay maybe the stamps will smell funny but that's okay, it will grow on you and the judges of the stamplicking competition.

Just don't get fruity and wait for the wrong types of fruits like italian grapes or puerto rican bananas like I did because these fruits carries deseases. Nononono. Whatever happens, the love of your life (god) will always care for you and grow durians for you to enjoy for the rest of your life. (and mouth)

23 comments:

Hariz Mohammed Shazalli said...

wtf? interesting content.. never thought durian can be linked with love. btw, link the CHP to my site where the CHP section is! kasi org paham..

Benrauf said...

dont like durian

arlina said...

eh, about the smart ugly girls, i am quite terasa :O haha. maybe because im ugly, only how i wish to be smart. -_-

KakaXY said...

arghh
got to find durian

KakaXY said...

p/S: durian can make u warm in those cold, lonely nights

Roti Kacang Merah said...

about that smart ugly gals?

you SO damn right over there, young man! thanks a bunch for that lil bit of dedication for us lot, heh ;-D.

you young men will soon realize that girls with looks and no brains will bore you to death; girls with brains but no looks will nevertheless make the girls ooze sexiness; but if you DO get attractive girls with brains, then you're one lucky guy!

just that out of my observation, attractive girls with brains would either not get married coz no man could match up to them, or they get the hottest and richest guy around and they end up being the stay-at-home moms and home-school their kids, or they get the most laid-back and intorverted yet successful brainy guy that silently match their grey matter and live happily ever after.

usually la. not all.

Lisa Farhana said...

i hate durians. so how? haha.

like this entry tho.

Helmi Razali said...

sebijik durian is 20pound here. Damn!

Afiq Deen said...

you r studying overseas. yes we geddit.

mgiL said...

alamak tak flattering langsung la!

mlle said...

your durian pic up there is so darn good that it makes me drool, haha!
I have to travel all the way to vietnamese quarter in melbourne city coz it's the only place i saw durian T_T
btw, good durian analogy^^
how do u find the book "The Prince" by Machiavelli? I have to read twice to grasp the basic message of the book (slow learner):)

Afiq Deen said...

machiavelli is more of an observer and not a great leader himself so it's interesting to have an insight of past leaders tactics to rule their lands. n the best part is that machiavelli compared great leaders techniques of conquest so we could apply the techniques where we see fit according to our own changing situations.

Oh yeah, i read it twice too. It is heavy so we have to make our own wikipedia research on some leaders mentioned so we could understand the politics and flow of events.

cheesy8 said...

hahaha....smart metaphore u got there!

btw i luv durian though! ;-)

Akmal Azeman said...

great. im the ugly girl type, though i wish im smarter. drattt!

Afiq Deen said...

elelelele... yelatu. you know what they say: beauty is skin deep. who are they nobody knows.

farahrozhan said...

Peculiar yet spot on analogy.

Helmi Razali said...

hey, when i read your reply, i got this impression that you perceived my previous comment as somewhat stuck up + showing off. is this true?

What i wanna say is that, i love durian, and it's so expensive over here. I miss eating all the durian and gulai tempoyak back home.

joegrimjow said...

cool
gud analogy

Afiq Deen said...

oh dang! so sensitive....

oh gosh! people like you still existssss!

just when i thought michael jackson is the last among you.

Helmi Razali said...

haha, not that sensitive, only a bit. Cuma i don't want people to think i'm a stuck up bastard tu je. he he. glad that the air is clear now.

Anonymous said...

I just discovered the website who writes about
many
home based business reviews

If you want to know more here it is
home business ideas
www.home-businessreviews.com

Anonymous said...

Sorry for my bad english. Thank you so much for your good post. Your post helped me in my college assignment, If you can provide me more details please email me.

Millermssv said...

eh, about the smart ugly girls, i am quite terasa :O haha. maybe because im ugly, only how i wish to be smart. -_-