e-Kerusi
Salam Maal Hijrah
Yesterday
Dr. Shukri
I have got my leave. Bid me farewell, my brothers!
I bow to you all and take my departure.
Here I give back the keys of my door
---and I give up all claims to my house.
I only ask for last kind words from you.
We were neighbors for long,
but I received more than I could give.
Now the day has dawned
and the lamp that lit my dark corner is out.
A summons has come and I am ready for my journey
CSI VS FORENSIK
CSI Las Vegas:
Gil, the head CSI entered the crime scene after talking to a phone line repairman. Without even looking back, Catherine sensed Gil's presence. "Three gunshot wounds, shot with a GK-2005 sniper." Gil squated in front of the body to checked the victim's face. "Pretty girl. So how was your date last night Catherine?"
"It went well except for the fact that he was moving on to me too close too soon." Cathering wore her rubber glove and picked up a pair of tweezers. "Look," She carefully manouvered her tweezers to reach the back side of the victim's right ear and found a strand of blue thread that didn't match the victim's cloth or her friends' clothes. She then packed it into an sealable evidence pack. "I'm just not the kind of girl who falls in love at first sight."
"You should learn a thing or two from this girl Catherine." After examining the body for just 3 minutes, Gil stood up and looked at an abandoned house nearby. "By the looks of it, she was struck by love at first sight, from a distant too."
Who are you? Who-who-who-who?
Forensik Kuala Lumpur:
Sharifah Mastura got a call from balai. She rushed to her Proton Wira car, got inside and starts the engine. The engine starts. She left the Jaya Jusco parking lot and enters the highway. Camera shot from the car rear miror. Another angle from the side miror. And then from the the passenger seat. She finally arrived to the crime scene. She opened the door and got out without turning off the engine. She realized her mistake, got back to her car, stopped the engine, switched off the air-con and took a pack of Premier facial tissue paper to make it look like she purposely wants to her tissue slightly chilled.
Di wajah curiga~ Dan nada resah~ Dirasa berbeza~ Terima segala~
(theme song entitled Dedebu Cinta by Misha Omar)
To be continued....
Ada Apa Dengan Namaku Afiq Deen
Akad Nikah Mawi dan Ekin
Karaoke di Kelab Darul Aman
I browsed the karaoke catalogue. Anita Sarawak, Ziana Zain, XPDC. Ah, KRU's Babe and Fanatik. These I can sing.
A line of armed britain royal guards marches along a paved road. Aha, a marching band gracefully takes on the bare parade and fills it with shining bronze musical instruments. (I have no idea why a sharp video caption of a procession of a marching band is used to assist karaoke singing.) "Lady~~" Datuk Kenny Rogers let out a sexay growl. "For so many years I thought I'd never find you..."
Ooooh, they have english songs too? I walked to the counter and passed by a plump woman in tight khakis and a new millenium tudung that resembled a bandana with its ends twisted and folded to form a crown? As usual, I made a mental commentary on her. Let's see... She must be a class F contractor or a MLM success story. I know this because she wears a magnetized bracelet and Ong beaded necklace. She's struggling but loving the results of her business venture. She's wearing expensive high heels but complimented them with an almost see-through frilly blouse (Youza!) Oh mai gawd, the seemingly harmless heels knows salsa! Tap tap tap.
New Year Resolution?
Old Steam and New Cup of Coffee
Yeah, that's some racist shit.
The only thing that's race prejudice about this country is our perception of other races. And we can't change people's perception with an enactment or akta. Or by making police reports and arresting racist bloggers. We can only change people's perception by first changing the paradigm of how we react to racist slurs. Yep, because the only harmful aspect of racism here is slurring. For a country that had an influx of immigrants half a century ago, our country is still considered one of the the most stable country in the world.
When the british left Malaya, the malay community gracefully accepted indian and chinese immigrants because they were necessary to keep this country afloat. By then, an understanding of coexistence was formed. Malays were thankful that the economy was runned by the chinese and the hard labour by indians. Indian and chinese were thankful that the malays provided them safety and assurance as well as a chance for them and their generation to be a part of something amazing: Malaysia.
As long as we have our differences, racist slurring is an imminent form of expression. We should make a mickey out of it and have fun laughing at others and in turn, ourselves. Should there be any hatred brewing from jokes and slurs, it only means people are relating those jokes and slurs with real life ordeals that stemmed from racism.
It's as simple as that.
When I read comments related to racism, it is staggering to see how many malays want the chinese and indians to leave Malaysia. The chinese rationalized that if they were to be exiled, Malaysia will face long-lasting hyperinflation and the economy will collapse. How very true. As it seems, everyone wants people of different race out of "their domain."
They seem to forget that our differences compliments each other and the symbiosis of this is a foundation of Malaysia. But today for example, the chinese and indians are safeguarding their children's isolated academic process and the malays are giving more opportunities for chinese and indians to enter high-esteemed education institutions. This rather unbalanced wave of prioritizing resulted today's Penang and tomorrow's Perak.
So let's just laugh about it. Laugh aloud and laugh together. Let go of old steam and make a fresh cup of coffee before somebody else draws out the steam and make a cup of cameronian tea with our teabags.
Lucky Portrait
Portrait of him is considered 'Ong' which means royalty or gold in chinese. His portrait symbolizes prosperity and profit because the late Sultan practically breathed life to Kedah when the state was abandoned (to avoid the casualty of wars.)
Kedai makan
Kedai runcit
Mekanik
I think it's amazing how a religious and pious man leader has incredible influence on everyone especially the chinese and indians, unlike our current prime minister Abdullah Badawi. His portrait brings 'Suey' or bad luck.
Every government office has at least one A3 size potrait of PakLah. No wonderlah our federal government is losing the confidence of the rakyat by the minute.
Here are my list suggestiona of portraits to boost morale of government servants:
for Kedahans
For Sehati Berdansa followers (losers...)
For Robert Pattinson's kipas-susah-mati (die Cullen die!)
For closet Mak Nyahs (especially pejabat military)
For Digi, Maxis and Umobile users
For fun
Why Camwhoring?
Because I Can't
Selamat Hari Raya Korban
Hari ni aku korbankan appetite aku yang diberi nickname vortex misteri atau the black hole dengan makan ala ala kadar sempena memperingati pengorbanan nabi Ibrahim dan Ismail. Aku telah memutuskan untuk makan light-light. Makan light-light aku consists of 2 potong kek coklat, 2 pinggan nasi goreng, 3 pinggan nasi bukhari, 1 mee guling, 1 crab sweet corn soup, sepinggan keropok lekor dan 1 low-fat yogurt (supaya tidak jadi gemuk)
The Domino Effect
PakLah managed to pull off an angry face and told the media "Enough is enough!" After the incident, a special team was assigned to investigate. Typical Malaysian attitude lah this. Hot hot chicken shit.
People know. A lot of people know what you did.
I have sufficient background in architecture to tell you that the party most responsible for this incident is not the developer, architect or engineer who built the houses there but the Jabatan Perancang Bandar dan Desa. They were the one who approved the construction of houses at a kawasan tadahan air. If anyone it to be blame it's the town and country planning department.
pay up your debts now or you'll regret it when no one wants to donate their alfatihah
The government will do anything to cover its ass including blaming developers and the rakyat when the fault is entirely JPBD's, a department under the jurisdiction of the federal government. This standoff-ish attitude adopted by the government is getting on my nerves.
to a person who passed on burdon to them
When Mumbai was attacked, the mayor resigned because he failed in tightening the security even though prior warning was given. Governers in the US resigned when their affairs were exposed by the media. Even Bill Clinton was impeached when he was found guilty of receiving blowjob(s) from a fat intern.
I'm avoiding you because i love you, because i want you to realize that
But here our infamous porn star Chua Soi Lek made a comeback in politics and is now the second most powerful politician in MCA. Mat Taib who was arrested in Australia for transporting a vast amount of cash (but he was released because he told the customs there that he allegedly didn't understand english) is competing for the title of Naib Presiden UMNO. Rafidah Aziz who was accused of corruption involving APs is still the Ketua Wanita UMNO.
life doesn't revolve around you like you think. you're not a superhero
Under normal circumstances of a democratic country, these poticians should no longer serve our nation.
Be a superhero and stop this nuissance, or you'll end up in the rags
Their insistence to quit their posts and the Prime Minister's forgive and forget attitude can only result a larger scale domino effect and the people that will get trampled on are the rakyat. We, the rakyat lah!
The Ejaculator
Directed and edited by Afiq Deen
Starring Hariz Shazalli
The Ejaculator.
Coming to a cinema near you!
Quarantine Meets Alien Vs Predator?
2 nights ago, I can't sleep and my cousin Hariz had to study so during his study break Hariz played with his green laser indicator (that is allegedly for engineers only) We began recording all the silly stuff we can do with the awesome indicator and tiba-tiba Hariz thought of making a short vid of him shooting toy aliens with his cross bow. Lepas habis record, the place was covered with bedak, tissue paper and lingering particles of Diyana's deodarant.
Best Giler tembak alien yang tak bergerak langsung! Hahaha!
It's Cool
No Money No Honey?
Oddly enough, I'm not thrilled that everyone is excited about working. I'm not even excited about working. Maybe because I know how it feels to earn money, which made me more conscious of the peril of knowing how necessity will somehow overrule the pleasure of spending it unnecessarily.
Spending unnecessarily is just an illusion; it is the dynamics of pleasure that comes from irresponsible spending which basically means spending more than one could afford at the time being. And the very moment this foolishness takes place is what people want, not the end result or the planning of it.
So in its bare essence, we seek not wealth but the moment we could spend wealth.
The most valuable thing perceptive to us is time. With this is mind, the wealthiest people on earth are not those who have the most money in banks or have vast amount of assets but those who spends every available second enhancing other people's quality of time as well as their own.
In due time
Verily! Man is at loss,
Except those who believe and do righteous good deeds, and recommend one another the truth, and recommend one another patience.
Al-'Asr: 1-3
Turkey for Thanksgiving
I know right. Afiq celebrating Thanksgiving after his lengthy blog entry on Halloween?
It wasn't my idea. My cousin suggested it and bought a turkey yesterday. What was I to do than to help her prepare and bake the turkey.
Smoulder cavities with salt and pepper, it reads. Mimicking a soft spoken chef, "Ya puan-puan, kita ramas-ramaskan ketiak kakun. Selepas itu ya puan-puan, kita ramas-ramaskan celah-celap paha dengan garam..." I turned the turkey breast first, smoulder melted butter and gave it a soothing massage.
If it weren't for the absence of surgical robes, masks and caps and the fact that the operation was done in a kitchen, we could've been mistaken as sergeons. "Kak Seri, bawakan stuffing." I examined the turkey's asshole by poking it with a wooden spoon to determine its diameter. "Okay, she's ready for her first and final penetration."
I suggested that we insert the stuffing through the asshole. Kak Seri retorted "Ish, mana boleh dong!". "Are you sure it's through the back?" Diyana checked the printed recipe and instruction we got from howto.com. I grabbed a handful and shove it through the turkey's asshole anyway. "Whoa, Afiq is getting turned on!" Hariz appeared out of nowhere with his videocam. "Oh yeah, you like it that way, don't you Afiq." I took my hand out from the turkey and sucked the remaining filling from it. Everything mundane needs a Wow factor when it is caught on video.
We'll make sure everyone eats the turkey first before we show them the video on how we prepared it. You know, just in case.
Fiver hours later....
Even though it was the first time we ever cooked a turkey, it was (do it like Jack Black in Nacho Libre) Fantastic!
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