ups and downs

(picture: a montessori kindergarten I designed)

I believe in life people worry too much about what's going to happen and why they're here and what will become of them.... so much that they are practically not living it.

Adults I've talked to will condescendingly boast "During my younger days, we were nasty rebels, tearing everything down, got into alot of trouble but eventually we'd always found a way out." They would recalled their fondest memories of being in the fraternity scene and their romantic get-a-way(s). Dissapointed at my attempt of being a 'good boy', they recalled more so called examplary past activities. It is never 'cool' to be a 'good boy'. Not for teenagers.

And they'll end their stories with "And look at me now."

I am looking at a person who's fondest memories are in the past. I am looking at a person who's youth is only apparent in their stories. I am looking at a person who talks nothing of the future or present. Like life is only a hurdle now until the calling of death.

I guess that they'd never planned their life to be this way during their teen years simply because they had planned it. And by planning life, they'd defied the unknown circumstances of life and they eventually have only a grasp of solace, in the past. Maybe this is how life punish people who tried to bend the possiblity of misfortune, death, divorce, bankcruptcy and lost during their earlier stage of life.

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