holy shit!

I'm feeling grey, that's why.

You have no idea how I would metaphorically stab -holidays- in pieces. Stab. Stab. Stab.

Most major psychological and emotional problem of mine happens during the holiday. Maybe I'm not preoccupied enough to withstand the holiday heat. People just love tailing my progress during the holiday. I hate when ppl do dat. Seriously.. what's your plan? what's plan?

My definition of a holiday is: days that I off my friek of a phone and dissapear from expectations. Because expectations both intimidate and anger me. I work so darn hard during my busy days, why can't I have my holidays to myself. Where I feed my impulse and enjoy the fruit and shit of it. what's my plan? to make sure I live a better life that you

I am afraid of the holidays. where I don't have suffer to succeed.

I cry a lot during the holidays. where i'll enjoy my passion and its fruit

I usually become hot tempered during the holidays. because its my life

I either lock myself in an enclosed space or walk in an unknown street to get rid of the fear and anger of the holidays. my holiday..

For what is worth, I blame myself for inflicting pain onto myself. I also blame expectations.
please give it back to its rightful owner
There you go, another personal entry that I will regret typing a few days from now.


cekmi said...

it's always ok to let go those shits afiq. dun worry.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm an archi student who do not have any idea of holidays n tis is new. During umi's time we look forward to holidays coz have lots of reconciliation to do with family n also new places to venture. All umi can say ur in love coz not seing that someone is very lonely indeed. Well dearest umi son welcome to a new era of life. May u find what's missing n do what u think is full filling.

Too much thinking sometimes mislead u. Why not try on inpulse n learn from it, however so be honest to urself about them.

Have a nice holiday n a very good sleep.