CUAK

I've been presenting analysis and designs for over three years and let me tell you this, please read the next sentence.
Okay, let me tell you this, can you read it yourself please.
That is how a studiomate present for over three years; let me tell you this, let me tell you this and he will end up not telling 'that'. Not familiar with the sudden gush of emotion? It's called CUAK. Yes, a combination of cukur and ketiak, a state where all your masculinity is stripped off, baring a helpless pulp of cekodok. But mind you, people react differently when they cuak. I'll list them down: Okay maybe I won't. I know some of you might be already bored with my listing antiques.
Some people will act cool and DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. They will smile a sweet serenade of ignorant bliss and somehow garnered enough natural botox in their faces to maintain that oh so fudging annoying smile.
Some people will suddenly become extremely bossy and will inevitably utter rude commanding words like Oi! or Hey! or Ane! This kind of people is trying their best to cover their asses to make it look as if they contributed to the team, if you consider bossing around during presentation a contribution.
Some people will stammer and fall and cry and sleep and forget about their manic episode the day after.
Some people will in a few minutes become natural einsteins You are one of these people if you can touch chin with your elbow. It's only natural for these people to be able to perform this task. Donno why..
Some people will enjoy the attention and speak their best accent (be it american, brit, brazil) They look at the crowd and wink like a sexy korean superdiva. Wink wink wink, wai da hel yu winki mi bak sumida.
People like me though will probably need a partner to present because I cannot possibly present anything without a trustworthy confidant. I will eventually steal his lines and answer all the questions until my 'confidants' would never want to present alongside me again. So I'll replace them with the smiley types. They can be positively assuring, with their stupid smile and shit.
And lastly there are people will suddenly become stupid or retarded. Their speech will slur and they will end up presenting like a politician sloth.
And there are people like you, who think they can get smart by trying the chin-elbow manuever.
Read a book!

2 comments:

I love happily ever after. :). said...

I was reading your "Allah is that you" entry. And just wanted to ask do u pray obediently? No offense, just curious. And wouldn't mind if you don`t answer but hoping that u will. thanks! :)

afiq said...

not that it indicates anything.. but yes I pray obediently for the past 2 years.