Quran-followers' Queer Queries

" We also (sent) Lut: he said to his people: "Do ye commit lewdness such as no people in creation (ever) committed before you? "For ye practice your lusts on men in preference to women: ye are indeed a people transgressing beyond bounds." - Holy Quran 7:80-81
Death sentence for practicing homosexuality in some Muslim countries.Muslim Gay Pride
It is rampant, it is becoming acceptable. Gay Muslims are beginning to come out from their closets and declare their sexual orientation. They pray, they fast, they believe in the Oneness of God and yet they're gay.
Homosexuality is a topic surrounded by taboo-chastes in Muslim communities, including BolehLand. It is something parents avoid in conversations. Well, we don't expect much do we? They don't even teach us about sex! (no offence to parents)
In my early years of adolescence, I, like any other teenagers had our blood pumped on anything that involves sexual pleasures. We were curious. We were horny. We did what we do best: we study about sex through the internet and women magazines, dismantling interconnecting hints about sex and sex and sex. Even though I was in the same light as them, I was somewhat eager to indulge in something a tad bit different from boobs and cunts. It all started with the word Anal I discovered from CLEO that leads to anal penetration that eventually leads to gay sex. Gay sex? It is suffice to say that Anwar Ibrahim's case was very educational.
"No dating, no babies, no fuss, and a lot of working out" I thought. I explored everything there is to know about homosexuality until the day I forgot to clear the history of URLs I visited. Kantoi. After an ordeal that includes crying for hours for forgiveness and temporary quarantine in my room, I concluded then that gay sex must have been the most enigmatic and tentalizing thing in the world. I mean for it to be between two extreme mode of acceptance: FEAR and PRIDE, I locked all the memories of pop-up nude bear daddies and androgynous twinks, hoping to understand the topic much further as I get older. When I am able to comprehend the rights from the wrong. When I am able to justify myself through knowledge.
For the time being (then), it'll be a secret between me and God.
When I reached a ripe and legal age of 18, the gay-chaste was finally unleashed by a studiomate of mine. Hazman is a year older, well-built and irresistable. I began to persue him as a 'normal friend' and I used all the oppurtunities I had to be acquainted with him. Our meet-ups became more frequent and as I can recalled, I was mesmerized by his presence. Sinful bliss. It was a one-sided friendship and his subtle animosity made him even more magnetic. I didn't realize then that my subliminal inclination towards him was more then being friends. It was torture. TORTURE. It felt so fucking weird. It had reached to a point where I had cried and sms-ed him gory hate messages when he declined my visit to his room. I recall one that sounds like this:
"Takpe Hazman, aku tak kisah. Tapi ingat, senang je manusia ni mati. Senang sangat. Tutup pintu n tingkap ko rapat2 ek... : )"
I woke the next morning and was WHOAAA... What a psycho biatch! Why in Ayah Pin's name did I sent him that message!
Then everything became clear. Everything. On why Islam forbids homosexuality.
First of all, Gay, Lesbians and Bisexual are Labels. I had a crush on a guy and now I'm deeply in love with a girl. Am I gay or bisexual? These labels are not orientations but are merely man-made popular culture.
It is very true, Gay sex is the most pleasurable sexual act. And like any other extremely pleasurable activities, it comes with a price. In terms of personal well being, homosexuals are prone of infecting HIV Aids and other STD to one another. It will also encourage segregations between communities caused by communal inferiority complex. Yalah, regroup and rejoice, blah blah blah, Gay United! etcetra etcetra. In a wider scale(national/regional) , the homosexuality practice do not produce offsprings, explaining the decline of birthrates in some developed countries.
Why am I attracted to some guys? Because some of them are androgynous. Islam had acknowledged that handsome young boys can be tempting. I read this from a religious book a few months ago.
"Do not sit beside noblemen's sons. Their faces are beautiful and they are even more tempting than that of young virgins."
And from the Quran:
"And there will go round boy-servants of theirs, to serve them as if they were preserved pearls." Al Tor 52:24
"They will be served by immortal boys..." Al Waqiah 56:17
(People who had indulged themselves in excessive exploration of beauty like Poet Abu Nawas and Davinci often slept with their young lovers.)
But for those who are adamant that they were born gay even though they are pious in practicing Islam, I can simply advise you that your inclination is a test from God. If you fight it, you will be richly rewarded.
Until further notice, Gay means Jolly Happiness!

47 comments:

Roti Kacang Merah said...

well said.
*clap clap clap*

felt like forwarding this to my gay best mates. Like, i love them to bits and accept them as they are, but yet as rakan seagama i feel sad that they're inclined to 'that' side yet i'm unable to help. and oh are they blessed with the nicest of hearts!

Nono Fara said...

Personally I cant accept bisexuality. Ok, I'm not tryna be a judgemental or what but to me we are created as we are and we are (human) the best creation ever, so we should live our life properly.., in this temporary life...

Bisexuality is haram cus it is harmful. We're not told that it is haram but we're TAUGHT so!It's stated in the Quran ""Whatever is good is lawful to you... (5:5(5:4))" So why bisex? Hmm..

For those who were born gay even though they are pious in practicing Islam.. I dont have words to sooth you but Afiq is just rite. So, fight the "abnormal" temptations!

afiq said...

redpeanut,

forward it to your gay friends lah. They tend to be sensitive, explaining their tendency to be oh so nice. Dang, I'm generalizing!

farahshila,

its not abnormal. Its kinda normal. Like I'd written, andogynous males are more tempting than women.

Human emotions are not equations.

Bisexuality and homosexually is haram BUT we can only be categorized as such only if we exercise our indulgence. So if you're married and is still attracted to extremely handsome young men and did nothing of the sort, you are not bisexual. Just a normal human being with an active sexual fantasy (which is very very normal)

renegix_01 said...

okayh..first of all..bisexual is haram indeed...n for your information..my roommate is a gay n fortunately he never try to flirt with me because i'm not a gay and against it!!...from what i've observed..this kind of people..they have something wrong in theirself that had tangled or lock their ability to think straight!..its not that they are special,different from others or bla2..the questions is why and how on earth did all of you stupid arrogant a##h###s let this thing happened to you?..no2..dont try to blame your parents,teachers,religion etc...why i said they are arrogant?..because they didnt think bout others and just want the best for them which is gayness...i know its a common things for us human to feel attracted to others because we are humans!..but we as a humans have limits that had been set for us to obey and live normally as a human being!the question is why are u stupid enough to surrender and dont have the guts to fight back?..dont blame others..blame ur weakness that will jeopardize urself someday..this is my advice..repent or rot in hell...

renegix_01 said...

one more..BOLEHLAND?...ahahha(so much for the contrary huh =P

afiq said...

although you made a pretty clear(and condescending) point, I however fail to see how your advice: repent or rot in hell is in any way effective. Well, the tendency of being homosexual comes in many forms. It's a perangai yg memudaratkan, mcm berjudi n minum arak ler.

But you know what, I'd learned that scolding them will make them even more persistent in their quest to 'freedom'. SO let us (afiq begins preaching) make merry with one another and embody peace for others to follow.

renegix_01 said...

yah..i agree with you..actually..the 'repent or rot in hell' thingy is not an advice to them..it's just a reminder from the religion point of view..well..nowadays people are very smart..so in order to 'convert' them to become normal again..we need to make them think..think why it happened to them..not ourself..why they have this kind of feelings..what are the consequences if u become a gay..will u befriend with AIDS if you have anal sex..how to omitt this kind of feeling...how to prevent urself from fantasizing or trying it..well the answer is islam itself..go back to the basic..n in order to do this..we need to guide them which im pretty sure that you can only do that if you become friends with them..not alienating or shunning them...zzzzz

p/s--->send my salam to sarah-starfish

Roti Kacang Merah said...

Afiq, looks like you're the only one among them here who's pretty much grown-up and seen the world, I must say.

It's good that these friends of yours voice out their oppinions now. Once they're really out there in the dirty real world and see what enfolds right infront of their eyes, they'll come back here and read their adolescent comments and laughed back at their "innocence-nonsense". And realise how correct you been!

Well done, young man. Keep it up!

sEaN = Se + An said...

WeIrD. i NeVeR fElT tHe NeEd To JusTiFy MySlEf. Do We? HoPe YoU aRe HaPpY wItH yOuR cHoIcE rEGaRDlEsS bRo.

sEaN = Se + An said...

My OfFIcEmAtES aInUl WhO uSeD tO wOrK wItH AbIm WaS oFfeNdEd By YoUr PoStInG rEgArDLeSs. I wOnDeR wHy BuT tO cxHickEn ShIt To AsK aS iT iS nOn Of FucKinG pRoBLeM. bRO, wItH aGe CoMEs WiSdOm

afiq said...

kukuman,

yeah yeah yeah... preach all you want father kuku but if you think that that will 'repent', you're in for a surprise.

redpeanutbun,

thanks alot, i'm only trying to expose some clarity on this issue.

setanboy,

I always need to justify myself with everything i do. U may call it conscience. A filtering process where the wrong are filtered from the right by knowledge.

Contoh: your friend is having a fight in his workplace. YOu, as a friend defended him but later, much later, you will question your action; is my friend really innocent? Should I encourage him to fight or chould I clarify to him the root of the problem?

There's a word for ppl who doesn't feel the need to justify themselves:

IGNORANCE

It's another a hurdle to the kingdom of heavens and we should make it through together, as an ummah.

irzan said...

wow, afiq. this time you really impressed me. i swear.

on being handsomely rewarded (pun intended) for being able to resist that temptation - well yeah i agree so much on that.

but you must remember with every rules comes a hole.

and the pinnacle of human being intellectuality is discovering that flaw of which you can escape that rule.

;)

generally, i don't support nor condone homosexuality, bisexuality, bicycle, gayah, whatever crap you may call it. i see it as a personal thingy - it's between you and god.

and labels - man you are so right afiq. other peeps don't have anything to do with those 2 except those 2 with god. that's all.

and maybe that's why parents chose not to discuss it, because they know it's an individual thingy. their son will know for themselves and hopefully be able to distinguish right from wrong later on.

as for you, i feel like you are OBLIGED to get married, jatuh hukum WAJIB kahwin dah nih.. lol..

good luck afiq resisting the temptation.

irzan said...

i know your first picture that shows 2 boys going to be hanged is from iran. those 2 are actually adolescent and their complaint when they're going to be hanged was "i saw my uncle and my dad did it" and so he did it with his friend.

they're underage. that's kinda sad, tho.

Hafidz Baharom said...

I believe that a person's sex alignment is decided before his religion. So all this talk about haram puts forward the fact that everyone is either a Muslim, a Jew or a Christian when there are many other groups of people who worship, or don't worship, as we do.

Yes, it is haram to act on homosexual tendencies. No, it's not haram to be born with it and accepting it.

Fine, so they like guys and have more creative and fashionable thinking than most girls, but as long as they don't act on the tendencies of male to male sex (or female to female, whatever they're inclined to), then why should we frown upon them?

I've seen enough tudung wearing girls with pink stripes in her hair, or tudung labuh girls who do so to cover hickies, and even some girls who go out hand in hand with boyfriends, smooching and making out on park benches.

These are just as haram. Who the heck determined the levels of haram, like girls making out with boys is less haram than guys being gay?

It's sick.

If you're a gay guy or girl, fine. Admit it to yourself. If you wish to admit it to the world, then do so. If you're a gay muslim, same rule applies.

Our religion says that you may not act out on homosexual tendencies as an act of control and moderation. Abide by it. If you cannot find yourself to control such urges, then I suggest you look into conversion and apostasy.

But if there are homosexual Muslims who are reading this, my suggestion is to confide in someone, even if you're a damned conservative PAS member. There is no benefit that can come from not discussing the conflict between your sexual alignment and it's temptations against your beliefs.

afiq said...

I've nothing to add. Those two were underage? God! How can that be? That's utterly ridiculous. Which country was it. Tell me.

Aput. You had pretty much conclude the entry. Brava!

Anonymous said...

sorry guys if this entry is concluded.. jus wana share my view.

1st. this blog make me proud... knowing that there's such thinking amongst the younger generation in m'sia... & i do agree that AF is a total waste. since the 1st one. But show must go on... business must run.. and job must be offered.. cari makan.. as long as halal.

2nd. being gay.. more right to say homosexuality. as afiq also had experience of the same sex crush...he's gay.. he just didnt pursue further to have homosexual activity. imagine if the boy that afiq had crushed with did entertain him the same... then the act was done and that wud have made him homosexual. (aargghh!!!) scary word huh.

i believe everyone is bisexual, male or female. gay is so everything, its in all of us. its the act that push the line. we shouldnt be arrogant here and curse and swear. given the right person, situation, & etc etc.. i bet any of us would be doing it, juz that you never have the right opportunity to do so.. and you dont need it... not ever (unless the right person come along.. with the right etc etc and right attitude etc etc) and if does, how far would you go. admitting true self and to restrain oneself is far better that being a hypocrite.

dont be afraid to be yourself.. being gay doesnt mean that you must fuck with the same sex. and religiously.. all of us should know where we should draw the line. even god is forgiving... and who are we to decide which hell's for who.

what's wrong is still wrong. doesnt matter according to which law and what book. its all in you.. if you say its wrong, then hold it firm. dont bark around and start pissing around the yard.

i'm not againts gay nor am i agreeing with such. but if tom cruise ever fell in love with me.. i wont mind a lipssmack or more than the arabian hug. haha

Anonymous said...

ever thought about how ideologies form and shape our lifestyle ?

Name one cancer , and i name capitalism as the disease..

afiq said...

Like I said. Gay is 's a label. I'm not gay. I have fantasies and crushes. That's all to it.

Anonymous said...

"Takpe Hazman, aku tak kisah. Tapi ingat, senang je manusia ni mati. Senang sangat. Tutup pintu n tingkap ko rapat2 ek... : )"

Whoaaa .. ngan senyum lagi tuh.
Gila aah .. lebih kurang mcm kes pembunuhan Gianni Versace oleh Andrew Cunanan. Better check that out on the net for the who's who.

Caya laar.

Regret that it didnt happen ... ahaks..

Aku said...

Afiq , you are so Androgynous.

Such a good write up. I had this kind of feeling last 10 years. Although some of you have made excellent point, yet, come as you are.

Act like Aristotle, behave like Prophet Mohammad.

What is wrong is still wrong.

maddieness said...

you read CLEO?
yay for guy who is man enough to admit that they do :)

lifeinside said...

Afiq ure brave enough to do this article. clappy2 too.

Jefri said...

hmmm, wow...thats pretty powerful. but i wouldnt know how it would be dlm Malaysia...because i was only there with my adolescent years, but living here as a teenager, makes a lot of differences, id think theres more gays/bis/lesbians here, about 20 in my high school

afiq said...

that's performing sodomy, which is haram.

Aamyra Amin said...

That was a brave article. I'm glad you wrote it, though. I just agree, you know?

To be honest, I'm still a little bit confused. I don't like to label myself, I don't think I'm bi, gay (lesbian) or straight. I'm just what I am. But if I were to label myself, I'd say I'm straight but curious, while some people would perhaps say I'm *slightly* bi, if such things exist. I'm a girl who looks at an attractive guy and say, "He's hot." But there are times when I caught myself looking at a girl, and my eyes stay at the same spot a little too long. And I have no problem admitting that I fancy the person if my heart really beats abnormally when I'm around them. I've felt this way towards both guys and girls. Some people might think I'm bi, and honestly, sometimes even I think so too. Sometimes, I go, 'Hey, I can still have a crush on that person and no one would know, besides it's not like I would actually pursue a relationship or something like that.' but at the same time I just know it's not right and then I'd try to fight it, and just have to win. My little conclusion, be it right or wrong, is that I just appreciate beauty, regardless the gender. It's either that, or I lose the game - and that makes me *not straight*. I still don't know, but *shrugs* I am pretty confident I'm still on the right (straight) road and I plan to make it stay this way. Wish me luck. *chuckles*

I don't think ANYONE is born GAY, even if they strongly believe so. I have gay friends, too, yeah. However I know some of them really didn't ask for it. When asked, often would they say.. it just happened. While that might be true for most cases, I still think they can stop it. It would probably hurt, yeah, and it would be extremely hard to fight it, but like you said, I quote,

"But for those who are adamant that they were born gay even though they are pious in practicing Islam, I can simply advise you that your inclination is a test from God. If you fight it, you will be richly rewarded."

Also, thank you for sharing your experience with us. Kudos to you.

Aamyra Amin said...

Ah, and all that said, I have nothing agaisnt gays, lesbians, bisexuals and all other labels. In fact, I have really close bisexual and gay friends, and I truly love them. God help me, I even think their relationships are sweet sometimes.

I HATE it when they got shunned or bitched at. Nobody asked to be mocked. While I don't think it's right, I respect their decision as it is their lives. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.

fadz said...

slm,

sedang blog hopping dan terjumpa blog engkau.. 1 perkara: kumpul dan terbit tulisan2 kau, aku tak pernah baca entri sematang, setulus dan se'telanjang' coretan engkau (contohnya seperti entri ni).. serius, simpan baik2 bro!

afiq said...

thanks for sharing Myra!

savante said...

Wouldn't say I agree to your views, Afiq - but I'm glad that you at least put it forth in a non-judgemental way letting others who think differently go their own way. Bravo.

brick said...

I have the same problem as you. Sounds like we are in the same boat. Have a crush on a guy (ok, more than a few...actually) and now I'm deeply in love with a girl. Can you share with me how to get rid of my occasional crush on some new-age sensitive guys - probably the result being under the (allegedly bad) influence of man-made popular culture? I really want to focus on loving my girlfriend and not get distracted like you do. Thanks, Lesbian Girl.

YOUR QUOTE
I had a crush on a guy and now I'm deeply in love with a girl. Am I gay or bisexual? These labels are not orientations but are merely man-made popular culture.

---------------------------

3,000 years ago when there were no religions (at least not the human-damning and decimating types that we have these days), life were so much easier. You just fall in love with someone and live happily ever after. End of story.

The biggest crime ever committed to mankind is not the invention of the atom bomb, fighter aircraft or gas chamber - but the invention of "modern" religions - which are increasingly misappropriated as tools to endow certain individuals and ruling class with perpetual power to oppress and exploit the ignorant and helpless, bringing pain, hatred, distrust and alienation among family members and friends. First the women (and still the women), then the slaves (so you think modern religion is offered to you free-of-charge?), then the sexual minorities. We can no doubt have faith in the eventuality that new categories of victims of oppression will be introduced should these few lose (or have lost) their favour, in a matter of time anyway.

I wish I can teach you how to love a girl deeply (READ tenderly and committed, not lustily as described above) as I do, but if completely heterosexual men are not even close to coping with that feat, I am not so sure you will want to.

If you can love a girl, why would you not do it, already?

To love truly and completely is what matters at the end of the day. You can be a Malay who label yourself hip-hopping Hispanic, or a Hindu who label yourself "true-green" environmentalist worshipper of the planet earth, but deep down inside, you can never lie to yourself about your state of mind. With the things and people you genuinely love. Yes, you're right: Put labels aside and ask yourself what is truly man-made.

If your "modern" religion does not teach you the value of honesty with yourself, and with your true being, and true love, what is the difference between you and a person who lived 3,000 years ago? Who is more "man-made" - you or him?

So, is this merely an issue of man-made popular culture, or of man-made popular religions?

The only real religion is one that is not man-made, one that will inspire you to live a life of fulfilment, even if you were to be born an orphan, deaf, dumb and mute, on a desert island; everything else is just a well-conceived product of man-made popular culture, usually with labels which show attributes of strong product branding, and comes with life-long after-sales services claiming to fix your dissatisfaction with the less-than-perfect quality and enjoyment of its use.

afiq said...

Heh. Islam, Christianity and Judaism are not man-made.

H.a.M.s.A.p said...

Interesting post! Loving it ~ ^^

Aqmal said...

Isn't it agreed that Allah SWT has power over the outcomes of events beyond human control?

Can we agree that these events include the traits of an unborn baby?

Studies have proven that for most people, their sexual orientation is predetermined even before birth, while the child is being concieved.

So to deny one's homosexuality would be like denying that one was born with brown eyes or dark skin. To conclude, if anyone is responsible for making an individual gay, it should be God.

You can wear contacts to hide your eye colour, but they'll always be brown. The only sin here is from the regret of not ever having to show ppl your brown eyes and the sin from the denial of your being.

yaya said...

i just came across ur blog and this topic is very interesting.
i had few male frens that had swing the other way and had major breakdown at some point of their life due to their diffrences.It is torturing to pretend to be someone that u are not cz the rest of the world sad to say is always judging u.U can say that oh go to hell wif wt ppl think n all bt deep inside u ll still be longing to be accepted.We are human being blessed wif intricate beautiful mix of emotions.I knw wt is wrong is still wrong.I just pity them coz life is not supposed to be dis difficult.Like u said..its a test..and whether we get thru it or not its all for the God to judge in d end.

sue said...

interesting..

A said...

Wow, hearing it from another Malay dude was totally unexpected. Like the rest have commented - bravo for the wonderfully written post!

I've somehow survived the torturous teenage years, having feelings of confusion over my sexuality & what's right/wrong. Society made me feel like shit, they made me feel like I am worthless and it's better for me to not exist than shame them with my homosexuality.

I don't care if I'm "born gay" or "born straight"; whatever you want to argue, I just AM attracted to guys & just CAN'T bring myself to like girls. Don't bloody say I haven't tried. I have. I bloody have!!!

But to no avail.

So who are you telling me I should keep on faking it for the sake of others?

Who is this 'God' people portray as homophobic, saying I SHOULD like a girl? I SHOULD get married? I SHOULD have offspring and be 'NORMAL'?

Sure, taunt me because I made 'a sickening choice' of being gay, quoting Kuku Man. I SWEAR if your brother or your son or whoever one day comes out of the closet, you won't dare say such thing. People are so quick to condemn, but when it happens to them.. you tell me.

I have friends who choose to conceal their homosexuality and practice religion. I admire them for being able to win the constant battle against 'evil temptations'. But you know what, after those many years of emotional breakdowns & feeling like killing myself & life is unfair, I'm just gonna live my life as I am.

Who ever God is, I'm sure contrary to popular bigotry belief, he loves me just the way I am. Because he created me & he as the Creator, therefore created homosexual tendencies too. Thus, I deduce: it. is. NORMAL.

Oh, and not all gay guys are doomed to catch HIV and develop AIDS. There are such things called condoms, HIV tests, picking your partners wisely & finally, common sense.

Finally, to all the hardcore Quran/Bible/Torah waving proselytizers who so happily shout 'repent or burn in hell':

I couldn't care less.

A

hazique said...

bout hazman...ur studiom8 2..is he haikal? hazman haikal? is it? (so much curious..hu3)

Muid Latif said...

I admire your drive and vocal to speak up, some of us may have fear to talk about this matter, having said that, you know we have to deal with the world of prejudgment.

p/s: nice writing btw.

Take care.
http://moedlatif.com

Herry said...

salam ,

regarding what u said before,

afiq! the only true religion is islam now even before,
Abraham,jesus or moses was never a jew(by religion) or christian,they're all muslim. There is only, a true follower of jesus & moses...christian & jewish religion was made after....made by those who claim that they're a follower of jesus or moses....jesus was never claim himself a christian even moses never claim himslef as a jewsih(by religion)

b|eedingsperm said...

Herry, what delusional world do you live in? Do you even know about the Bible before you speak of Jesus, Abraham and Moses? Maybe in the four corners of your mind they are Muslim but I can assure you they are not. Time to wake up buddy. Maybe Muhammad was Jewish? Ever thought of that?

b|eedingsperm said...

Oh yeah, nice writing dude. Thanks for the insight.

Anonymous said...

its a fact dude(Bleedig...)....Abraham(Ibrahim),Jesus(Isa),Moses(Musa) are muslim's prophet .....muslim knows a lot bout their prophets for the Al Quran ....i dont have to know much about bible to know about jesus,Abraham,Moses,enoch,John,Lot,....because in the Al Quran already mentioned about them...and we know bout beloved jesus(Isa) more then you are....as a muslim we also have to believe on the original gospel(Injil) ,while there are so many bible version on this earth is just a doctrine .by the way you have to learn bout religion even more.....

herry said...

Ismail & ishak(Isaac) are Ibrahim(Abraham) sons, Muhammad are from ismail line...while lots of other prophets like jesus(isa),Moses(musa),John(yahya) are from Isaac line of ancestor..

Fairuz Selamat said...

dude...
this article is very good one...
gay or not... let them be
the thing is... our view of this matter...
and i like the way u did...
great writing

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Shawal said...

nice post. LOL. labels are so over rated right now.

you had your revelation.

let's help others who seems to be "sexually confused".

Ap said...

i believe that it's not a sin to BE gay or bi..
d feeling of being gay is a test from God..
it only becomes a sin when u have gay SEX..
well, dat's wut i think anyway..
>,<