Everyone knows, muslim or non muslim, that pre-marital sex is forbidden. The consequences of doing so may vary; celebrities get more publicity coverage, kampung couples will get shun by the kampung people, city couples will probably boast about it in front of their friends but not to their families la, god forbids!
As a muslim adolescent stepping into the adult world, I am well aware of Islam's jurisdiction on pre-marital sex and so far, I've obeyed it.
"So how can I cope with my inner sexual tension?"
I've asked this qustion to my highschool Ustaz and to my utter annoyance, he ignored it. Since then, those very words spread and I was being known as the Sexual Tension Kid for a while. Blergh! Lesson learnt: no more question related to e-hem. Recently, I mustered enough courage to ask my roommate (whom to my advantage is a pretty religious guy),
"Well, the right thing to do is to sembahyang sunat."
"You're saying when I start fantasizing about boobs and etc I have to perform a sembahyang sunat. If that's the case, if you've told me earlier, I would already become a saint!"
He frowned. "You will get wet dreams jugak... why so frustrated?" He realized something: Afiq hardly sleeps. "Ha ah kan? Macam mana yek? So how do you deal with this... errr... problem?"
"I masturbate."
"YOU WHAT?"
"I didn't stutter, did I?"
His eyes widened. I'm not sure which part shocked him. The confession or the content of the confession.
"What, you're saying you don't?"
Silence.
Good heavens, this guy CAN'T lie.
"Ahah, a hypocrit!" I joked.
But that's not really the point (of him being a hypocrit). The point is this issue is such a taboo that no one is daring enough to explain about the nature of it. Well someone did: my sex ed teacher,but he's christian. Generally, it is rumoured to be Haram but it was decided in accordance to some Mazhabs' views and opinions. Does masturbation affects the well being of people? Scientifically, NO. And I can well remember that there is no such jurisdiction in the Quran or Sunnah about the issue.
Islam is a religion of revelation and reason. To simply put it: if it's not in the Quran or Sunnah, use common sense.
So I dare to conclude that masturbation is an act of relief and should be done only when necessary. Overdoing anything can affect our well being. Islam IS all about moderation. I hate to break it to you but this issue was only clarified to me by a christian missionary. Where were you, ustaz and ulama when we were in great need of your advice?
11 comments:
It's interesting because during my college years Islamic studies, there was actually an open discussion between the students and our ustaz regarding this issue.
From what I recall, the consensus was that it is permissible as it will stop you from doing further sin, such as sexual harassment and rape.
Hope this helps. Sometimes it really is important having a spiritual guide who can be open about issues that pertain to your everyday life.
ah, another afiq *bleep* issue ;p
i heard from one ustaz that it is wrong to masturbate.
i did not ask the question openly though, but someone else did and i overheard it.
i dont have much say in this one.
but may you be relieved of sexual tension.
haha.. dang, sounds wrong.
- Puteri.
=)
aida; regarding this matter, women are excused because masturbation may affect a woman's virginity. So it is a matter of priority and choice. But really, women do not enjoy physical stimulation as men do. They do 'things' in their tudung clad brains.. Hoho, do I sound sexist to you? I dunno lah.
Pu3
We are from Red Mars and you are from Blue Venus
Mirul, talking from experiences huh?
very well said.. especially the 'common sense' part :)
somesay its weaken ur memory..how about dat for a student huh?
i thought masturbation is a normal thing, eh afiq?
no, it doesn't affect the memory, so they say lah... u'll never know really. But masturbation that is done addictively will affect the psychological state. (so they say lah.....)
susah nak cakap, tapi jangan la dibuat hobi. Porn companies must have threatened the scientists not to reveal the whole truth about masturbation.
everything should be done in moderation~
I think when I did dare asked my mum about this, she said something about amal ibadat tidak diterima for 40 days or 40 years, or something like that.
Imam Shafi'i stated that masturbation is forbidden based on the following verses from the Qur'aan (interpretation of the meaning):
"And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts). Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess, - for them, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors." 23.5-7 Here the verses are clear in forbidding all illegal sexual acts (including masturbation) except for the wives or that their right hand possess. And whoever seeks beyond that is the transgressor.
"And let those who find not the financial means for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah enriches them of His bounty." 24.33. This verse also clearly orders whoever does not have the financial means to marry to keep himself chaste and be patient in facing temptations (including masturbation) until Allah enriches them of His bounty.
You are the most outspoken jerk i've ever read.
hope to see you in campus. Yes, i'm taking up architecture too.
tata!!!
Hmm...what miss aida said its true....there was a debate amongst the ulama' about this matter...
yup, basically it is HARAM....but when your sexual desire is too high and you are afraid you can't control it.....and when you have the probability to do zina or rape, then its better for you to masturbate....
i'm so sorry i couldnt prove mmy words with any hadith or phrases from quran, which i should do (i'll try to find it later)....but i hope it can help those who are confused with this matter....
and one more thing, i wanna comment on tinylittlepinky's comment....
i'm not really sure whether masturbation is included or not...coz it says in quran, "hendaklah kamu menjaga kemaluan kamu, kecuali kepada isteri,....."
i hope you really sure when u prove something with quran, and never misinterpret it....because a bit faulty in there might cause people to confuse....:P
what i'm saying is just make sure you really know what the phrase of quran says, and then u can let other people know ok....
coz i'm not sure about that comment you posted...
hope no one will get offended with my comments here...
so sorry if my words offended anybody....
Wallahua'lam....
Wasalam...
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