Panda

I never noticed them before. There were times when I looked at myself in the mirror and exclaimed "Hmm.. maybe I'm tired. They will dissapear tomorrow."

Although repeatedly accused of being vain, truth be told, I don't look at myself in the mirror regularly. I brush my teeth in the shower while humming an Enya hymn. I shave once a month. That's about it.

Yesterday, I decided to shave to get rid of my patches of prickly facial hair (I'm still under developed in that department). As I put on a playful handful of shaving foam on my face, I examined my face's every crook and cranny. Pores getting smaller, expected. Jaws getting wider, hereditary. White hair here and there, whatever. And then I saw them: the very instrument used to make this observation possible. Omg, panda mana sesat ni?

The snow white foam contrasted a dark sinewy shade below my eyes. But this time, the dark circles were darker than ever. I grabbed my Enya playing phone and took quick shot:

I'm not seeing things anymore. These panda eyes are legit. I got proof.

Okay, so I might have put on a little bit too much shaving foam. I heard shaving foam can stimulate facial hair growth. (No harm in trying)

I googled Panda Eyes and compiled all the tips and medication to get rid of them. Some websites claims that panda eyes are hereditary, which I quickly dismiss as a presumptious theory.

So mission baru bulan depan: MISI MENGHAPUSKAN PANDA.

Not exactly a WWF friendly mission but it has to be done, or else PANDAMONIUM will commence. Yeahh... lameness personafied...

Halal ke?

After a whole day out with my friends, we decided to have dinner before we go back to our respective homes.

We surveyed the area for half an hour before making up our minds. Most of my friends wanted to have dinner in the only malay restaurant in the area. I insisted that the vegetarian indian restaurant is a better choice because the dishes served are cheaper and cleaner. For them, the malay restaurant is the obvious halal choice even though the kitchen located outside was visibly dirty and unruly.

"Eh, ko biar betol? Cam tak bersih je tempat ni."

"Daripada pilihan pelik ko." Lan chuckled. "Din...din... lain daripada yang lain..."

"Okay, okay, cuba perhati betul-betul. 1. Dapur dia tepi longkang. 2. Dorang simpan kuali dorang atas lantai. 3. Aku pernah makan dah kat situ. Ajinamoto banyak sangat sampai terbakar kerongkong."

"Tapi restoran tu orang melayu yang masak maka ia halal."

"Tapi takde logo halal."

Another friend broke our duo formation. "Daripada makan lauk hindu yang tak tentu halal, baik makan je tempat yang kita tahu orang Islam yang masak. Halal!"

"Halal ke?" Afiq Deen never gives up.

I'm not fussy when it comes to eating. As long as the food is clean and delicious, I'm game. To be perfectly honest, I have my own methods to determine whether or not the food I eat is haram or halal.

In urban KL, muslims take the Halal stamp for granted. It is a fact that most or more than 80% of food restaurants in KL are owned by non-muslims. Some multinational fast food chains like McDonald's and KFC are certified 100% halal but other popular western concept restaurants only have certificates for its bread but posted the Halal certificate on the counter anyway to imply that all the food in its restaurant is halal.

Restaurants that serves Dory fish got its fishes from dirty fish farms like this in Vietnam:

Some establishment feels that it is unnecessary to have the Halal stamp like gerais and roadside restaurants.

Have you been to malay stalls lately? Ever check their kitchens? It is a habit of mine to go to the toilet after eating and I notice that the toilet is always next to the kitchen. Gerai kitchens are always nearby open drains and the plates are washed on the floor. It didn't matter to me that the owner and cooks are malays because under the mentioned conditions, the gerai might as well serve pork.

I remembered Atok's self-made acronym: Ha, To, Ba. HTB in rummi.

Atok pointed out three simple things that I should consider before eating anything. It has to be Halal, Toyyiba and Barakah. For the food to be halal, it has to be within the scope of edible food in Islam and slaughtered by muslims. Toyyiba means Good. The food has to be good for you and your body. Barakah is how the food brings blessings to everyone.

(This is rich, coming from a guy who have eaten snakes, crocodiles, frogs, pork and maggots.)

Pantun Hari Jadi Hariz

Hariz, a genius cousin of mine is now studying in Western Michigan in America. Since he's 22 hours away from us, we'd no choice but to send him a simple birthday wish in form of a pantun. So we, Nael and I made a few rangkaps of pantun to spice up his FB wall.

(The pantuns are peppered with family inside jokes so you might not understand some of them.)

Pak Haji suka berangan,

Mak Haji takut lipan,

19 menjadi kenangan,

20 menjadi harapan.

.

Sedang tengok cerita korea,

Muka semua plastic surgery,

Selamat menyambut di Amerika,

Jangan lupa makan kari.

.

Pergi ke langkawi tak ajak,

Pergi dengan Juliana Evans,

Sana takdak kedai mamak,

Takdak jugak Juliana Evans.

.

Alamak! Lupa bagi mesej dia...!

Tapi takpa, kata Nisa,

Walaupun lambat di Malaysia,

Belum lagi 5hb di Amerika.

.

Bermain-main burung di bilik hujung,

Di bilik hujung tingkap tak terbuka,

Bila lagi nak balik kampung,

Bawa Juliana sekali ya?

.

Menunggu di ruang tamu,

Perut berdangdut akibat lapar,

Afiq seronok melayan tetamu,

KAMI LAPARRRRRR!

.

Tahun baru sudah menjelma,

Bulan baru sudah bermula,

Haris ada selsema?

Kami di sini hangat ada laa.

.

Budaya kita balas membalas,

Kalau bertemu mesti bertanya,

Ini satu soalan ikhlas,

PS3 disana berapa harganya?

.

Lompat disana lompat disini,

Disitu lompat, disana pun lompat,

Mari berkelah di tasik Chini,

2 3 kucing berlompat.

.

Mencari awek diseberang Utah,

Awek puteh bertetek megah,

Semua awek disambut meriah.

Awek hitam harus ditegah.

.

Kereta Putra kereta Satria,

Mana nak sama kereta BMW,

Bila berjumpa bersuka ria,

Didalam hati I hate you....

.

Mak Inom kahwin lain,

Gunung Daek bercabang tiga,

Happy Birthday!!!!!!!

Sharia Caning

Last week when I read about how women are to be caned according to the Sharia Law, I thought it was to educate the public before Kartika's caning. I recently found out that the three women on the newspaper I read were ACTUALLY caned for performing illicit sex with their boyfriends.

It was interesting to learn that the three women turned themselves in after performing illicit sexual acts with their boyfriends. One of them will continue her prison sentence after the caning. But where are their boyfriends? Shouldn't they be punished too?

But you see, all three women bore a child from their premarital sex so the babies are proofs of their wrongdoings whereas for their boyfriends to be convicted, there should be four witnesses of the said crime (sex out of wedlock).

I think this law is outdated. We can trace human DNA now. A simple paternal test and identification by the mother can easily determine the father of the child.

I read about the procedures of the caning and I can tell you that I was beatened far worse than the caning of all three women put together for lying about my report card when I was 9. Caning, of course, is the least painful form of Sharia punishment.

Sharia law varies as muslims reasoned and formed various punishments according to their understanding of Islam. The capacity of enforced Sharia laws are also different because it is imposed in accordance to respective mazhabs. Here's a brief visual aid of some of the punishments implemented by the Sharia in different countries:

Public execution for homosexuals in Iran

Amputation for thieves in Nigeria.

Stoning to death for adultery in Somalia.

Public caning for illicit sex acts in Acheh.

I know, gruesome.

In my personal opinion, I would rather see my country practice only one brand of law. You can call me ignorant or wrong or whatever but I am in favour of being judged by only one law system. Civil law can absorb some elements of Sharia law that is still relevant in this day and age.

Some sharia punishments should be rethinked and abandoned to make our single law system relevant for all, muslims and non-muslims. Idealistic, maybe. Possible, yes.

People who are in favour of having the Sharia law fully implemented should think again. The fall of the Ottoman 'Empire' was caused by the decision of its religious leaders; they decided to practice an outdated approach of Islam that was relevant in the past. The results of their poor decision resonated to this very day.

I hope caning is the only punishment implemented by the Sharia law in Malaysia. If religious authorities decides to make ways for more sharia punishments, Malaysia will no longer be associated with words like 'moderate', 'modern' and 'progressive'.

Sharia Caning

Shidee Kahwin Muda

I'm clueless when it comes to entertainment gossips. I can't be bothered to read gossip columns and magazines so I make it a point to watch Melodi every Sunday without fail. Melodi does a good job of summarising the whole week's gossips into an entertaining lunch sideshow.

This week's hot topic is popular singer (really?) Shidee's marriage to a young girl who is allegedly the daughter of a woman Shidee dated a few years back.

I found the whole interview entertaining and chuckled a whole lot because the underlying hipocrisy was too much to bear.

First Melodi asked the girl's mother about Shidee's recent marriage. She told Melodi that she knows Shidee well so she refused to say bad things about him. She told Melodi that it is not fair to tell the world that Shidee is a kaki perempuan, kaki judi, etc. Okay...

Then when Melodi inquired Shidee about whether or not he dated his new wife's mother in the past, he was repulsed by the very idea. He told Melodi he would  not do such things. He made it sound like it's wrong to date a widow, like it's a taboo. He said his peminat will not like it if he marries a janda. He then confessed that he knew his new wife when she was in 'belasan tahun' and there were very much in love with each other.

I find this picture very wrong. You see, this is Shidee:

I have nothing against old men who wants to marry belasan tahun girls but it's just wrong to be disgusted by the idea of dating a janda. It can even be politically incorrect because it is our responsibility to protect the rights of widows. With many malay ex-husbands refusing to pay their ex-wives' nafkah, widows should not only be sympathised, they should be prioritised when being considered for marriage, especially for old farts like Shidee.

I may be biased because I have many widows in my family but the idea of marrying an older widow is not a bad one. I once even fantasised about marrying Zaha Hadid. 

Janda kan banyak... experience. 

Accident

It wasn't really my accident. It was theirs.

It was 2 am and I was driving back from Tok's house with my brothers. The fuel gauge indicated that I have about 30 km left so I made my way to a nearby Caltex.

There were many parked cars at the Caltex compound so I stopped my car at the entrance. Without warning, a passing motorcycle swerved towards my car, fell down and skidded on the road.

"Allahuakbar! Allahuakbar!"

Did I just killed someone?

I rushed out of my car muttering Ya Allah Ya Allah Ya Allah Ya Allah. There was a pool of blood and two shellshocked makciks on the road. I remembered my training. I checked for signs of internal injuries and scanned their boddies for cracked limbs. The motorcycle driver wailed "Sakit.... sakit.... apa hang buat kat aku ni?" Her passenger was still in shock. Her small round eyes were time-travelling vortexs. I caressed their backs and told them that everything will be okay, that I will take care of them.

More people surrounded the scene. Chinese folks who parked their car nearby walked pass as if nothing happen. A thin middle age malay guy shoved me with his hardened brick hands "Hang buat pa ni ha?" There was a small commotion until they eventually figured out that I'm not chinese. If I was, I could've been hit by the crowd. Welcome to Alor Setar, Kedah.

I ignored the guy and assisted the makciks to my car. I sent them to a nearby hospital and was informed that they only sustained external injuries.

Thank God!

It has been 4 days since the incident happened but to this very day, the vivid image of the makcik's vortex eyes is etched into my conscience. Her small unblinking eyes spelled out hopelessness. It's a look I once saw on a rabbit before it was brutally scythed by a golden eagle in a documentary.

Afiq's Hairy Situation

I'm going to cut my hair in two days. It might not sound significant to blog about to you but please note that I cut my hair twice a year. That's once in every 6 months.

One of my 2010 year resolution is to 'Cut Hair Every 2 Months'.

So instead of cutting it short and letting it grow back like lalang belakang rumah for 6 months, I want to style it up a bit lah.

I did some research on which hairstyle fits me best.

Okay first, determine shape of face.

Notice that I like to nod in pictures. That is because I have a long face but without the supporting cheek bones so I need to make my face look more balanced and round by nodding a bit. But with a fitting hairstyle, I don't need to nod anymore.

I rounded up 4 asian singers that has similar face structures like mine (omaigod perasan gila babing). I want to copy one of their hairstyles but which??? Let's deliberate:

1. Lee Joon from the band MBLAQ is sporting a karat coloured fringe that hides his eyebrows. I have very thick Shin Chan-like eyebrows so it would be nice to cover them up. But then again, there had been many old chinese folks who complimented me on my eyebrows. They told me that I have a set of Great Chinese General brows. His sideburns gives an illusion of cheekbones, to make the face look square and masculine.

2. Ajoo is sporting a sprouty look that adds width to his long face. His sideburns plays an important part in this look because they are layered to make the sides of his head fluffier. I like this hairsyle because it exposes Ajoo's forehead. I have this fringe for god knows when so getting rid of it is a probable option.

3. Lee Hom's hairstyle here is interesting because it requires the least styling. I rarely style my hair even when I go out so it makes sense to keep the styling to a bare minimum. The problem is with this hairstyle is that it looks like a typical SRJK cut. But I like how my ears can poke out of my mane. It has been a while since I last listen to the morning breeze.

4. Choi Siwon has a clean but funky look with this hairstyle. It is similar to Ajoo's but the direction of the hairlines are clearly defined. This hairstyle is very function appropriate. I want to go to more functions this year so this hair is suitable for events that requires me to be both casual and edgy. BUT, I have a very distinct hairline that will make my whole hair face the same direction.

I'm going to use one of these four hairstyles for the whole year (no joke) so this decision is kind of important.

So what do you think?

1, 2, 3 or 4?

Hina Nabi Muhammad Dalam Facebook?

Did you read Utusan today? I didn't. Someone in facebook posted a newslink about a man who made a police report against Lynette Lincoln and Joanna Ann for their comments on their facebook page.

They allegedly insulted Nabi Muhammad so an executive of a company filed a police report. How is it insulting to Nabi Muhammad? Let's read the comments:

Do you think it's insulting to Nabi Muhammad?

In my personal opinion, neither of them insulted Nabi Muhammad. They were angry about the controversy revolving the use of the word Allah and blamed religious fanatics who did not "follow the teachings of Nabi Muhammad" but followed babi muhammad instead.

Get it?

They didn't call Nabi Muhammad babi but claimed that the fanatics who made this issue controversial did not follow Nabi Muhammad but a false impression of their prophet.

I'm not trying to defend them for the sake of being contrary but their comments are minsconstrued by many malay muslims. Even though many malays know how to read english, we do not necessarily understand the underlying context of some expressions.

For example, when Sharifah Amani said "I sound like, stupid when I speak malay." Majority malays thought it meant "The malay language when spoken is stupid" but in Amani's context, it meant "I do not speak malay well so my speech will suck if I speak malay".

It is obvious that we are protective of Islam and Melayu. Any 'dirty' or 'haram' words like Babi, Stupid etc when used in the same sentence with words like Melayu and Islam will automatically anger us malays.

This is how most of us malays think when we read the comment:

"Okay... I know Nabi Muhammad and I know Babi. How dare he calling our great nabi a babi! How dare his!"

You know what's the actual problem is guys? An average malay only reads two pages of english content in one year. They do understand english but can hardly grasp the context of written english.

I learned that the hard way when I wrote this. Because some words that are considered dirty are placed next to words considered holy, they accused me of making fun of Islam. How dare his!

So guys, be careful with your comments and status, especially when it is written in english. The ISA and government is not the people you should be afraid of. It's the netizens who hardly reads or speaks english but will unabashedly misconstrue your comments.

They will copy their screen, inform their friends and set up a group against you. There they will give their members your facebook address, blog address or phone number and will go on a holy crusade to curse the living hell out of you. Then, a few members will lodge police reports against you and you will be detained.

(This strangely sounds like something a communist country would've done. It is similar to what the Read Guards did in China during the Cultural Revolution helmed by Chairman Mao.)

Gambar Kantoi

Remember anak pontianak Zarina Ann Julie? When explicit pictures of her leaked, she was fired from her job and is now a mollywood slut, datehopping from one upcoming celebrity to another. The pictures were of no pornographic significance but her image was directed to a kampung demographic so she was unofficially banned from appearing on daytime TV.

When raunchy pictures of female celebrities leak, they often had to pay the price like wearing a tudung (for a while) , performing Umrah and confessing tearfully on Melodi. But when explicit pictures of male celebrities surface the net,

1. They will just tell pondan entertainment journalists that the pictures were photoshopped.

2. Claim that the guy in the pictures is a look-a-like.

3. Orang cuba fitnah saya bla bla bla..

4. Buat tak tahu jerr.

The same applies to working class people like you and me. Girls who takes pictures of themselves naked and got them accidentally leaked (usually done by bitter ex-boyfriends) are often labelled as sluts and bohsia while guys pay no heavy consequence of their actions. (Edison Chen is not Malaysian) Why?

Because explicit pictures of guys memang tak laku. Most Malaysian girls are not as openly perverted as the guys but they layan pictures of their own gender to compare and contrast.

Explicit pictures of guys are only widely circulated in niche gay blogs and forums.

When I was younger (as if I'm so old now, haha) I experimented with my camera a lot but I deleted all the personal porn I made so I'm clear of any explicit pictures. Some of my friends are not so lucky. Pictures like this (below) are circulated in blogs and are used repeatedly by adult network users who are too shy or ugly to use their own pictures.

A friend of a friend told me that he received pictures that he claim is from an architecture student in UIA so when I take a look, I was flabbergasted.

It's a disturbing thought to have seen an erect penis of someone I know. But then again, it is also a confirmation that I am bigger man. Ahaha, you know us guys.. cars, houses, wives, whatever, we are genetically inclined to compare.

If I didn't delete the underage porn that I made, I could've been him.

So guys, even if no one would pay attention to your private pictures, do not take 18SX pictures of yourself because you will deny yourself from having a chance of becoming:

1. A Prime Minister or a minister.

2. An Ulama' or Ustaz.

4. An Islamic programme talk show host.

5. A CEO or Chairman of GLCs.

6. An underwear model (no surprise... so what's the point?)

But if you are still degil and take pictures of your penis with a complimentary headshot, be prepared to be featured as a gambar hiasan in gay malay blogs like this.

V-Day

Valentine's Day is coming up real soon. I know we Malaysians have different views on Valentine's Day.

Conservative muslims opposes the celebration because the day commemorates a Christian saint and encourages dating-touching-kissing-sex-haram!

For chinese Malaysians, it's a 2 in 1. Chinese New Year and Valentine's Day. Mandarin oranges on beds of roses.

For teenagers, it's a trip to the mall to buy cheap and cute presents to their puppylove spouses.

For me, Valentine's Day is meaningless because I'm hopelessly single.

Even when I was in a relationship, I didn't celebrate Valentine's Day because I told my girlfriend that I'm not in love yet. It was a cruel thing to say but it was the truth, I didn't love her. I've never loved any of my ex-girlfriends because if I did, they would still be with me now.

I don't condemn people who celebrate V-Day because they have the right to celebrate anything anytime. Even for muslims, Allah encourage His followers to love each other. What many muslims (especially teenagers) misunderstood is how to love each other. But can we blame them?

If you happen to watch malay dramas on TV, you will notice that love (the romantic kind) only revolves around unmarried folks. Married couples are portrayed as contented, bland and boring or experiencing marital problems. I know that TV won't be much fun if unmarried couples dwells on serious matters and the married ones cover the romantic bits but this state of mind seems to rub off on viewers.

TV9's talkshow Semanis Kurma that features a married couple who talks about relationship issues were frowned upon because there were episodes that showed the speakers playfully chasing each other . Many viewers found the display of playful affection grotesque and disgusting and complained to the network and the media.

Now how strange is that? The same reaction was received in Yasmin Ahmad's Gubrah opening scene and the bilal and wife scenes. Yasmin Ahmad was also quoted saying that it is strange that Malaysian viewers can tolerate spousal violence but can't stand to see them being affectionate to each other.

Eh, where were we?

Oh yeah, V-Day.

Happy Valentines everybody. If you're in love, get married now. It only takes RM90 to get married. You don't need the hantaran, persandingan etc. because those are just Hindu customs passed down to us by default.

We're muslims, no?

Datuk... Nenek...

Two years ago I tagged along with my friend's club and went camping. I thought it was a typical jungle hiking expedition. You know, the macho bonfire-guitar-maggie-sardine-mosquito kind of camping.

But it wasn't.

The club was a religion affiliated club. I won't say the club's name because curious googlers might end up in my blog when googling this club's name (and will get me in trouble). Before going in to the jungle, the club leader recited a 5 minutes doa to 20 fellow trekkers. 10 girls and 11 guys. The guys were either over or ill prepared for the 3 days 2 nights camp. The girls donned very inconvenient tudung labuh and carried with them heavy kitchen tools like spatulas, woks and large pots.

Long story short, the camping trip was not fun at all. It may be fun for them but it wasn't for me. Personally, camping for me is all about enjoying each other's company and doing unconventional activities like talking about life while gazing upon sihouttes of canopy trees, enjoying the zen of things and you know, just surviving.

The fellow trekkers spent their whole first day setting up an elaborate camp, cooking for a kenduri and clearing the forest. The night was spent praying and performing tahlil from maghrib to 11. The girls, haha, that's all they do, talk and cook, talk and cook. But mind you, these girls are 'religious' girls from a mostly sekolah menengah agama background. I couldn't even talk to them without having them fix their gaze at a nearby tree. Annoying but precious little gems. We were also seperated from sight by a long ass curtain made out of rolls of tikar.

I frowned at my friend when the camp leader announce the day's activities. My eyes stung a "I thought you told me that this is going to be fun!" look. The following day was spent walking around the jungle, swimming at a nearby river and helping the girls set up the kitchen. It was quite fun but the thought of the following night planned activities left my easily excitable soul jaded.

Before dipping into the river, the leader said a few words of caution "Kalau nak buang air kecil atau besar, beringatlah untuk mintak kebenaran dulu ye."

"Macam mana?" Everyone looked around. What? Did I ask a taboo question?

"Brother, anta tak pernah ke hutan ye? Takpe, ana tunjukkan. Senang saja, sebelum buang apa-apa, sampaikan salam dulu macam Assalamualaikum Datuk... Nenek... Ana mahu buang air kecil di sini. Jangan apa-apakan ana dan keluarga ana. Jangan ikut ana dan rakan-rakan ana. Lindungi ana daripada kesulitan hutan... haa macam tu."

"Datuk.. Nenek..." I paused for a while. "Macam tak kena lah cara tu. Tak boleh ke baca doa masuk tandas dan langkah kiri je?"

"Anta rasa cara ni salah?" I can tell that the camp leader was putting on a tolerant mask. The tolerant mask is usually used when confronting non-believers, sceptics etc. The mask bears a put-on smile, porcelain cheeks and a pair of stinging evil eyes.

"Nak tahu tak kenapa kalau ada insiden petir, mangsanya mesti orang melayu?" The floor was silent so I continued "Sebab kita panggil jin-jin hutan Datuk Nenek. Bila ada petir, petir tu sambar..." I waited for someone to answer.

"Jin." No one answered. "Petir akan sambar jin. Bila ada ribut, lintang pukang la jin mencari cover. Tetiba dorang teringat, dorang ada cucu manusia yang panggil dorang Datuk Nenek... Dorang pun take cover dekat orang melayu macam anta. Tu lah sebab dekat Malaysia, orang melayu je kena sambar petir."

I was anticipating smiles but everyone looked at me grimly, like I did something really really bad. I looked over at my friend just to make sure. He was shaking his head.

With his tolerant mask still on, the camp leader said rather animatedly "Seronok betul kisah anta!" He turned his back on me and walked on. "Mari berwuduk semua, Zohor dah masuk."

I put on my What Did I Do Wrong? mask.

While walking to the river, my friend pulled me to stay back. "Ish Afiq, ko janganlah cakap benda macam tu lagi kat sini. Bahaya! Nanti benda buruk akan jadi."

I sniggered. "Ko la satu! Ko kata camping ni seronok. Cam taliban je aku rasa."

"Ko ni tak faham lagi! Inilah camping cara Islam. Kita orang Islam kenalah ikut camping cara Islam!"

"Ye ye.. " I put on my surrender mask. Whatever.

7 Signs of Upcoming Chinese New Year

1.

Racist Malaysia

A former aide of our Prime Minister tendered his resignation recently when he allegedly said something racist during a seminar. Just this morning when I was on my way back to Kuala Lumpur, I had breakfast at Bukit Gantang's R&R and ate my nasi lemak with a bespectacled middle age man. He was reading a newspaper and exclaimed loudly "Semua isu pun nak dipolitikkan! Pelik betul betul parti politik dekat Malaysia."

I reacted with a whimpering "Memang semula jadi lah tu." a simple fuse that trascended into a half an hour long conversation.

Racism in politics is inevitable in Malaysia simply because political parties are race-based. It is not hard to understand this. Because these parties represents their own race, every race issue when politicised is a blessed (and free) party campaign.

Today, when the opposition has more grip on our nation, race issues often escalated and breed anger, contempt and yes, undying party allegiance. There will be more racism-induced conflicts in the near future, I'm quite sure of it.

Siapa Pendatang?

Nasir Safar, an aide to Najib Abd. Razak tendered his resignation when he allegendly said something racist. Here's a gist of the the things he said during a seminar:

Scary

You know the last entry I wrote? I didn't write it.

Someone else did. I deleted it yesterday and it appeared again today. Then this morning when I checked my blog to make sure everything's okay, there was a link for people to watch 4 Peringkat Ajal.

Someone knows my password and is deliberately blogging as me in my blog.

I also have a suspicion that I sleep-blogged. Is that even possible, to blog while sleeping?

Whatever it is, I'm scared.

Can I F**k You Today?

That is what Saiful Bukhari said he heard from Anwar Ibrahim. Did Saiful resisted by escaping the wrath of Anwar? He claimed he didn't. If this is true, the sex was consentual. It doesn't matter which side you're on, you can't help but to feel that Anwar had a murky past. Even if he didn't f**k Saiful Bukhari, all his enemies directed their bullets at Anwar's peepee. That is why I'm still under the impression that Anwar Ibrahim f**ks men.

If you don't agree with this assumption, you also cannot agree with Anwar's innocence. What proof do you have to lay against me to prove that he didn't f**cked men before?

I got proof. Saiful swore it so.

I want to see Anwar Ibrahim do the same before we can officially clean this slate and start deliberating again whether or not he f**cks men.

Rethinking Diversity

I would think that diversity is more than the hue of our skin, our mainstream cultures, our languages and accents, more than the diversity of a selected criteria.

I think diversity is not justified to be defined in a communal sense but as a personal anthropology. I like eggs you like ham; you know, that kind of thing. The smallest things, like preferring jazz to metal is the best definition of diversity because the influence that brought by trivial preferences is by far the most free-willed personal choice.

This kind of thinking made me rethink diversity. This is why cute kitten videos are the most popular videos in youtube. Cute kittens videos are not bounded by race, language or skin, just interest.

And that's the most interesting and pure kind of diversity: interest.

That is why I chose to ask volunteers about their favourite food, music, movies etc. because those trivial preference is the purest form of diversity.

Busy

I'm currently making 5 short videos and ads for competitions all around the world. I'm not much of a social butterfly to land contracts in Malaysia so I prefer to get my much needed experiences by entering competitions.

I have poor parents so to I fuel my passion with the money I make from competitions. I don't think they even understand how badly I want to be the best in the biz so they only gave me money for food and transport. I am not alone. Malay parents are usually like this. They don't like to invest on their children. Instead, they invest most of their money on their houses, cars and land. They want their kids to suffer like how they suffered when they were younger. This is why most second generation malays are in the poor-middleclass category.