Aiseh

My limbs won't listen to neutronic instructions. They heed the nerves contraction but ignore the mechanism of the coding. They'll go "What the hell do you want me for, you maniac!"

My limbs are going against the wishes of my brain. And the weird thing is, my brain refuse to comply with my limbs' wishes out of revenge. For example, I wanted to type 'across' and having that word typed a few thousand times, Mr. Brain decided to process it as "what the hell is across? Is it A Cross? Maybe it's accross? Hey fingers, maybe that word never existed?" So I have to check Dictionary.com to get a confirmation, only to listen a discreet chuckling from the depth of my skull.

Angry of the un-syncing of my brain, I lashed my inner fury and typed "I'm stupid" and before typing stupid, I froze and my brain became vacuum for a few seconds (an incident similar of getting high of alcohol) and only managed to type the word "Stupid" by concentrating on the keyboard. I spent about half a minute just typing that Stupid word.

There are many similar incidents. One was when I refused to defend my design because I was trying to be (whatdoyoucallit?) adamant to the lecturer's taste and my brain made me stutter, sneeze, and urge my bladder to burst only to see no liquid coming out from my genitalia as soon as I was in the toilet. Other times, the brain took control of my whole body but this happens when I couldn't get a grasp of what's really happening.

It happened. I was somewhat surprised. I was caught by a STAD officer for having long hair, wearing black jeans and without my matrics card.

STAD: Why did you have long hair.

me: It's not really long, my collar is too high, plus my neck is shorter beyond average, making the length seems exaggerrated.

STAD: Oh, Jeans are not allowed

me: But these are Black jeans. Only blue jeans are not allowed.

STAD: I don't like your jeans.

me: I don't like your slacks.

Among the 11 students interrogated by that very STAD officer, I was the only one left un-summoned.

It was analter-ego of mine many known as MADBA. Madba the Cynical. Madba the PraiseWorthy. Madba the Psycopath. Madba the Architect.

An alter ego that resides in Afiq the Mediocre. Afiq the Normal. Afiq the NewlyWashedClothes'SmellLover. Afiq the BookReader.

Somebody save meeeeeeee~~~~

4 comments:

Hafidz Baharom said...

STAD: I don't like your jeans.

me: I don't like your slacks.


I like this one...hahahaha!

Anonymous said...

man, those STAD officers takde kerja betul :-P

- Puteri.

lubna said...

Its called bipolarity.

Don't worry Afiq. At least there aren't any voices in your head.

TTFN bro. ;)

afiq said...

what;s TTFN